2024_08_09 Insight Post- Karenna Rowenhorst

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This week’s reading- Luke 10:38-41John 11John 12:1-3

I’ve done a lot of Bible studies that include the experiences of Mary and Martha. My favorite one was called Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver. Mary is the one most people focus on, since she “made the right choice,” according to Jesus (Luke 10:42). Mary chooses to focus on Jesus, leaving other tasks undone. Unfortunately, I am not like Mary.

Whenever I take a personality test, they always confirm that I am the type-A, make-a-list and get-it-done kind of person.  I am a firstborn child, and I know how to take charge, make it work, and keep it organized, all while making a sandwich for anyone who is hungry. Basically, Martha is my hero.

My question when I read the story of Martha getting upset at Mary (Luke 10:38-41) is always – “We can listen to Jesus, but I know we all need to eat too…how is that going to happen??” Let’s be practical for a minute. If we are all sitting at Jesus’ feet, that means no one is getting dinner ready. As much as I would want to focus on the teaching, my mind would be distracted by what we were going to do when Jesus finished speaking.

What I’ve learned about myself is that practical tasks are how I show love. Preparing food, finding just the right gift, or decorating for a party are all ways to show someone I care.  When I am getting these things ready, I often imagine how the person will enjoy them and it fills me up with joy inside. And these can all be good things. But for some people, doing those practical tasks can look like I’m ignoring the people in the room. And Martha’s problem, I think, isn’t so much that she is doing the practical household tasks, it’s that she becomes bitter and angry at her sister for choosing something else. By choosing to sit at Jesus’ feet, the meal might come later than expected, especially since Martha had been counting on Mary’s help in feeding their guests. The challenge is that these tasks have a tight hold on Martha.  She needs things to happen on her timetable, with her expectations met. And she feels personally offended when her sister chooses time with Jesus over their dinner schedule. Instead of being flexible about lesser things, she makes them the most important thing.

And we might think – “Of course learning from Jesus is more important than the dinner being late!” If Jesus were at my house, I would never do that. But the thing is that Jesus is at our house, and Martha is like many of us.  Maybe our “dinner” is a work project, TV time, scrolling on our phone, our to-do list, or collecting clothes, cars, tech gadgets… We are all prone to put less important things above the most important relationship of our lives. I know I am.

So how do we handle the practical tasks of life when we want to make our focus about relationships and putting God first? I think one idea we can hang onto is how we do what we do.  Can we do our tasks joyfully? When our attitude is right, we can do the same things with a much different outcome. God tells us that when His joy is in us, it gives us strength.  “…for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” (Nehemiah 8:10b) Deep joy that is not dependent on our circumstances produces a strength in us that cannot fail. We rest in knowing God and knowing that He has the final victory. If we’re doing things out of guilt or ambition, we are not keeping God at the center of what we’re doing. We can check our attitude by asking ourselves if we can hold our plans and schedules loosely, acknowledging that God may have other plans for us. Can we pray to see the people around us as dearly loved by God and worth our time and attention, not as obstacles in our way?

Another way to make sure we prioritize time with God is to look at our calendar (or however you organize your day) and make an appointment with God. Sometimes we need the structure of an appointment to help us make space in our day. Sit down with an empty chair next to you and imagine Jesus sitting next to you.  Read a Psalm or sit quietly and focus on the love God has for you. It may feel strange at first, but it is powerful and can fill up your heart in a way that only God can.

Karenna Rowenhorst
Senior Director of Education